White Knight

Seems every time I bring up the white knight it is in reference to some gender equality issue. This time is no different.

Back in High School I went out with a girl that hated when I did things like hold the door open for her, tried to pay for her meals, and really just defered to her in any way. She somehow felt that these actions were my way of making her out to be "less than" or inferior to me.

Recently too I red a blog that claimed that women wanted a man that was not chivalrous, that treated a woman as an equal.

I've heard women complain that chivalry is dead, and women complain about men being chivalrous. Pardon my simple male brain, but what is wrong with a man having a simple respect for a woman?

My holding the door open for you or buying a meal is not meant as an indication that you, as a female, are somehow "less than." Half my board is female, and that was not by design, although it is coincidental that the females are segregated to the Queenside of the board and the males to the Kingside. It just worked out that way.

And for heaven's sake, my offering to buy you a drink at the bar is not my way of telling you that I want to get into your pants.

I was raised to respect women, and as I grew up I learned to respect people. It is possible for a guy to act wihtout ulterior motive. And it is possible for a guy to hold the door open for a woman and not think that she is utterly incapable of figuring out how to exit (or enter) a building without the help of a male.

I guess when it all comes down to it, if I have to pretend to be rude just so that you don't feel I am looking down on you... well, maybe it is better we part company. It will be much better for your self-esteem.

Black King <-> White Knight

Ok, a very serious post. Something has been bugging me lately.

Back in December I had a really hot date. She was drop-dead gorgeous and dressed to kill. We had a really great time, I will spare you all the details, but she had a little too much to drink and when I brought her to her house I found that she was locked out.

So I did what every red blooded American male would do...

I made sure she managed to get inside and safely to sleep.

I am the Black King in this chess game that is life, but in my heart I am still the white knight, I would find it very hard to live with myself if I took advantage of a woman like that. I did what I know was the right thing to do.

Yet upon confiding in some friends and telling them this story they called me an idiot and said that she must have planned all this. What I find interesting is that the friends who said this were females themselves.

Is it really so commonplace now that women expect and even insist on being taken advantage of and, essentially, raped? Is my respect for a woman really that out of this world? I could chose to believe that they were just mocking me and poking fun, but even in jest they are revealing a social norm and expectation, a man is expected to take advantage of a woman in a precarious position.

Well, I don't regret my decision that night. If I am weird in showing respect for the fairer gender, call me crazy. But inside of me beats the heart of a White Knight.

Frankly, I am bothered that society finds my actions unusual and would condone such unbecoming behaviour.